Poem: The bottomless pit

I would like people around me not to judge
me or the things around.
That's a dream i can't fudge
none of them will ever budge.

Things like this will always abound
so what should I do?
can only poison spew?
I don't know ... it's confusing
it needs a lot of musing.

It all boils down to this -
will you live life according to the world miss?
Sorrow is yours for the asking
in glory there will be no basking.
Matters you have to take in your own hand...
how much will you simply rant?

But I wonder,
do I have the power?
Really?
Is it all that will take
a better life to make?

What about my self doubts?
of which I have several bouts...
how can I change that?
that's the question of the hour
I don't think the solution is only power.

How much can I SWOT analyse?
I seem to have no choice...
in circles I go round and round
no solution can be found.

Books and books have I read
(should have fooled around instead)
Things seem more complicated
Oh! this journey seems ill fated!

What is wrong and what is right?
I don't know any more
try, try, try as I might.
Things seemed simple before
and now I can't see the light.

My whole value system lies shaken,
my very foundation seems broken.
How do I rebuild it from scratch?
Where will I find what will match?

But...but...but and but...
that doesn't make the cut.
The who, where, what of it all
is enough to make one want to bawl.

So again we come to where we started.
The answer is not from me parted.
How do I find it... how do I find it...
This is such a bottomless pit!

-Written without a pause at a time when I was terribly lost. Being usually stuck at rhymes, I surprised myself that it flowed at a time like this.